Women often tell me that they are afraid of negotiation, that they either just do not know how to do it to get what they want or that they do not have confidence that they will be ready enough for any negotiation.
Whether it is a salary negotiation, bidding on a job, or solving a problem on a job site, you can have an effective negotiation and get the results you seek following some logical and well-planned steps.
The very first step is to start in your own head. The voices in our heads often dissuade us of our ability to successfully negotiate. Just say "no" to those voices!
Negotiation does not need to be equated with conflict. In fact, starting with thinking about the issue as a problem to solve and that your negotiation partner is part of your process in reaching a solution will help reorient your view. Because women are natural collaborators, if we approach our negotiations as getting a deal done rather than getting a "win," we are more likely to enter the process with confidence. And confidence will get you halfway to your goal!
Your mindset—how you look at the world and your attitudes that influence how you interpret situations—plays a key role in how you negotiate. Often our mindset in a negotiation is that we are in opposition to our negotiation partner. In many situations, your negotiation partner may hold an opposing view or position. However, if you start with the mindset that your "opponent" is instead your "partner" in reaching your goal, your entire mindset and all of your resulting actions will change.
Instead of, "I can't believe they won't give me a raise," think, "I can explain to you why a raise will be beneficial not only for me but also for the firm." You can see how your discussion will automatically change.
In addition, when you enter into a discussion with this collaborative mindset , you tap into your natural tendency to find effective solutions and carry an inherent amount of self confidence that will make others want to agree with you.
In relationships, whether they are person or business relationships, no one really wants conflict. If your mindset is such that you are seeking a collaborative solution, others will naturally want to join you on this journey.
Now that your mindset is attuned, we will discuss in my negotiation blog some practical steps to prepare for your negotiation. If you have any comments or questions, please post them and start a dialogue.
Related Stories
| May 16, 2014
BoA, USGBC to offer $25,000 grants for green affordable housing projects
The Affordable Green Neighborhoods Grant Program will offer 14 grants to developers of affordable housing in North America who are committed to building sustainable communities through the LEED for Neighborhood Development program.
| May 16, 2014
HED expands leadership in San Diego
Neville Willsmore, Thomas Christian join leadership team for Harley Ellis Devereaux.
| May 16, 2014
Toyo Ito leads petition to scrap Zaha Hadid's 2020 Olympic Stadium project
Ito and other Japanese architects cite excessive costs, massive size, and the project's potentially negative impact on surrounding public spaces as reasons for nixing Hadid's plan.
| May 15, 2014
Paints, coatings, and sealants: 10 new ways to seal the deal
Color-shifting finishes, dry-erase surfaces, and stain-blocking paints are highlighted in this round up of new offerings in paints, coatings, sealants, and finishes.
| May 15, 2014
Biking to work up by 60 percent, according to Census Bureau report
Many U.S. cities are seeing an increase in bicycle commuters, according to new a U.S. Census Bureau report. While bicyclists still account for just 0.6% of all commuters, some of the nation's largest cities have more than doubled their rates since 2000.
| May 15, 2014
'Virtually indestructible': Utah architect applies thin-shell dome concept for safer schools
At $94 a square foot and "virtually indestructible," some school districts in Utah are opting to build concrete dome schools in lieu of traditional structures.
| May 15, 2014
First look: 9/11 Memorial Museum opens to first-responders, survivors, 9/11 families [slideshow]
The 110,000-sf museum is filled with monumental artifacts from the tragedy and exhibits that honor the lives of every victim of the 2001 and 1993 attacks.
| May 14, 2014
New study shows employees aren't happier working in green buildings
People working in buildings certified under LEED’s green building standard appear no more satisfied with their workplace environments than those in conventional buildings, according to new research from the University of California, Berkeley, and the University of Nottingham.
| May 14, 2014
Construction growth looking up: Gilbane Spring 2014 Economic Report
Construction spending for 2014 should finish 6.6% higher than in 2013, with nonresidential work contributing substantially.
| May 14, 2014
Prefab payback: Mortenson quantifies cost and schedule savings from prefabrication techniques
Value-based cost-benefit analysis of prefab approaches on the firm's 360-bed Exempla Saint Joseph Heritage Project shows significant savings for the Building Team.
