Women often tell me that they are afraid of negotiation, that they either just do not know how to do it to get what they want or that they do not have confidence that they will be ready enough for any negotiation.
Whether it is a salary negotiation, bidding on a job, or solving a problem on a job site, you can have an effective negotiation and get the results you seek following some logical and well-planned steps.
The very first step is to start in your own head. The voices in our heads often dissuade us of our ability to successfully negotiate. Just say "no" to those voices!
Negotiation does not need to be equated with conflict. In fact, starting with thinking about the issue as a problem to solve and that your negotiation partner is part of your process in reaching a solution will help reorient your view. Because women are natural collaborators, if we approach our negotiations as getting a deal done rather than getting a "win," we are more likely to enter the process with confidence. And confidence will get you halfway to your goal!
Your mindset—how you look at the world and your attitudes that influence how you interpret situations—plays a key role in how you negotiate. Often our mindset in a negotiation is that we are in opposition to our negotiation partner. In many situations, your negotiation partner may hold an opposing view or position. However, if you start with the mindset that your "opponent" is instead your "partner" in reaching your goal, your entire mindset and all of your resulting actions will change.
Instead of, "I can't believe they won't give me a raise," think, "I can explain to you why a raise will be beneficial not only for me but also for the firm." You can see how your discussion will automatically change.
In addition, when you enter into a discussion with this collaborative mindset , you tap into your natural tendency to find effective solutions and carry an inherent amount of self confidence that will make others want to agree with you.
In relationships, whether they are person or business relationships, no one really wants conflict. If your mindset is such that you are seeking a collaborative solution, others will naturally want to join you on this journey.
Now that your mindset is attuned, we will discuss in my negotiation blog some practical steps to prepare for your negotiation. If you have any comments or questions, please post them and start a dialogue.
Related Stories
| Jan 3, 2012
Weingarten, Callan appointed to BD+C Editorial Board
Building Design+Construction has named two new members to its editorial board. Both are past recipients of BD+C’s “40 Under 40” honor.
| Jan 3, 2012
New Chicago hospital prepared for pandemic, CBR terror threat
At a cost of $654 million, the 14-story, 830,000-sf medical center, designed by a Perkins+Will team led by design principal Ralph Johnson, FAIA, LEED AP, is distinguished in its ability to handle disasters.
| Jan 3, 2012
BIM: not just for new buildings
Ohio State University Medical Center is converting 55 Medical Center buildings from AutoCAD to BIM to improve quality and speed of decision making related to facility use, renovations, maintenance, and more.
| Jan 3, 2012
New SJI Rule on Steel Joists
A new rule from the Steel Joist Institute clarifies when local reinforcement of joists is required for chord loads away from panel points. SJI members offer guidance about how and when to specify loads.
| Jan 3, 2012
AIA Course: New Developments in Concrete Construction
Earn 1.0 AIA/CES learning units by studying this article and successfully completing the online exam.
| Jan 3, 2012
The Value of Historic Paint Investigations
An expert conservator provides a three-step approach to determining a historic building’s “period of significance”—and how to restore its painted surfaces to the correct patterns and colors.
| Jan 3, 2012
28th Annual Reconstruction Awards: Bringing Hope to Cancer Patients
A gothic-style structure is reconstructed into comfortable, modern patient residence facility for the American Cancer Society.
| Jan 3, 2012
Art Gensler: Still Making a Difference for Clients Every Day
After running what is today the largest architecture firm in the world for more than four decades, M. Arthur Gensler, Jr., FAIA, FIIDA, RIBA, is content to be just another employee at the firm that bears his name.
| Jan 3, 2012
Gensler: 'The One Firm Firm'
The giant architecture firm succeeds by giving each of its more than 3,000 employees the opportunity for career growth and professional leadership.
| Jan 3, 2012
Rental Renaissance, The Rebirth of the Apartment Market
Across much of the U.S., apartment rents are rising, vacancy rates are falling. In just about every major urban area, new multifamily rental projects and major renovations are coming online. It may be too soon to pronounce the rental market fully recovered, but the trend is promising.
