Women often tell me that they are afraid of negotiation, that they either just do not know how to do it to get what they want or that they do not have confidence that they will be ready enough for any negotiation.
Whether it is a salary negotiation, bidding on a job, or solving a problem on a job site, you can have an effective negotiation and get the results you seek following some logical and well-planned steps.
The very first step is to start in your own head. The voices in our heads often dissuade us of our ability to successfully negotiate. Just say "no" to those voices!
Negotiation does not need to be equated with conflict. In fact, starting with thinking about the issue as a problem to solve and that your negotiation partner is part of your process in reaching a solution will help reorient your view. Because women are natural collaborators, if we approach our negotiations as getting a deal done rather than getting a "win," we are more likely to enter the process with confidence. And confidence will get you halfway to your goal!
Your mindset—how you look at the world and your attitudes that influence how you interpret situations—plays a key role in how you negotiate. Often our mindset in a negotiation is that we are in opposition to our negotiation partner. In many situations, your negotiation partner may hold an opposing view or position. However, if you start with the mindset that your "opponent" is instead your "partner" in reaching your goal, your entire mindset and all of your resulting actions will change.
Instead of, "I can't believe they won't give me a raise," think, "I can explain to you why a raise will be beneficial not only for me but also for the firm." You can see how your discussion will automatically change.
In addition, when you enter into a discussion with this collaborative mindset , you tap into your natural tendency to find effective solutions and carry an inherent amount of self confidence that will make others want to agree with you.
In relationships, whether they are person or business relationships, no one really wants conflict. If your mindset is such that you are seeking a collaborative solution, others will naturally want to join you on this journey.
Now that your mindset is attuned, we will discuss in my negotiation blog some practical steps to prepare for your negotiation. If you have any comments or questions, please post them and start a dialogue.
Related Stories
| Nov 11, 2012
AIA: Building Envelope
Preventing and treating failure in glazed curtain wall systems. Earn 1.0 AIA/CES learning units by studying this article and successfully completing the online exam.
| Nov 11, 2012
Greenbuild 2012 Report: Hospitality
Hotel boom signals good news for greener lodging facilities
| Nov 11, 2012
Greenbuild 2012 Report: Government & Military
Public sector remains a bastion of sustainability
| Nov 11, 2012
Greenbuild 2012 Report: Healthcare
Green medical facilities extend beyond hospital walls
| Nov 11, 2012
Greenbuild 2012 Report: Multifamily
Sustainably designed apartments are apples of developers’ eyes
| Nov 11, 2012
Greenbuild 2012 Report: Higher Education
More and more colleges and universities see sustainainably designed buildings as a given
| Nov 11, 2012
Greenbuild 2012 Report: K-12
High-performance schools put ‘sustainability’ in the lesson plan
| Nov 7, 2012
John Portman & Associates awarded new high rise in China
108-story building to rise in Nanning, the Capital City of Guangxi Province.
| Nov 7, 2012
Two Thornton Tomasetti projects receive 2012 International Architecture Awards for Best Global Design
The awards, presented by the Chicago Athenaeum Museum of Architecture Design, the European Center for Architecture Art Design, and Urban Studies and Metropolitan Arts Press, Ltd., recognize excellence in architecture and urban planning.