Women often tell me that they are afraid of negotiation, that they either just do not know how to do it to get what they want or that they do not have confidence that they will be ready enough for any negotiation.
Whether it is a salary negotiation, bidding on a job, or solving a problem on a job site, you can have an effective negotiation and get the results you seek following some logical and well-planned steps.
The very first step is to start in your own head. The voices in our heads often dissuade us of our ability to successfully negotiate. Just say "no" to those voices!
Negotiation does not need to be equated with conflict. In fact, starting with thinking about the issue as a problem to solve and that your negotiation partner is part of your process in reaching a solution will help reorient your view. Because women are natural collaborators, if we approach our negotiations as getting a deal done rather than getting a "win," we are more likely to enter the process with confidence. And confidence will get you halfway to your goal!
Your mindset—how you look at the world and your attitudes that influence how you interpret situations—plays a key role in how you negotiate. Often our mindset in a negotiation is that we are in opposition to our negotiation partner. In many situations, your negotiation partner may hold an opposing view or position. However, if you start with the mindset that your "opponent" is instead your "partner" in reaching your goal, your entire mindset and all of your resulting actions will change.
Instead of, "I can't believe they won't give me a raise," think, "I can explain to you why a raise will be beneficial not only for me but also for the firm." You can see how your discussion will automatically change.
In addition, when you enter into a discussion with this collaborative mindset , you tap into your natural tendency to find effective solutions and carry an inherent amount of self confidence that will make others want to agree with you.
In relationships, whether they are person or business relationships, no one really wants conflict. If your mindset is such that you are seeking a collaborative solution, others will naturally want to join you on this journey.
Now that your mindset is attuned, we will discuss in my negotiation blog some practical steps to prepare for your negotiation. If you have any comments or questions, please post them and start a dialogue.
Related Stories
| Jun 17, 2013
DOE launches database on energy performance of 60,000 buildings
The Energy Department today launched a new Buildings Performance Database, the largest free, publicly available database of residential and commercial building energy performance information.
| Jun 14, 2013
First look: Callebaut's eye-popping Möbius building for Taichung arts center
French design firm Vincent Callebaut Architectures has released renderings of "Swallow's Nest," an entry in a design competition for a new cultural center, fine arts museum, and public library in Taichung City, Taiwan. The building, based on a Möbius ring, swirls around a central "Endless Patio."
| Jun 14, 2013
Purdue, industry partners test light steel framing for seismic safety
A partnership of leading earthquake engineering researchers from top U.S. and Canadian universities and design professionals from the steel industry have begun the final phase of a three-year project to increase the seismic safety of buildings that use lightweight cold-formed steel for their primary beams and columns.
| Jun 13, 2013
7 great places that represent excellence in environmental design
An adaptive reuse to create LEED Platinum offices, a park that honors veterans, and a grand national plaza are among the seven projects named winners of the 2013 Great Places Awards. The Environmental Design and Research Association recognize professional and scholarly excellence in environmental design, with special attention paid to the relationship between physical form and human activity or experience.
| Jun 13, 2013
Richard Smith joins Cannon Design Science + Technology practice
Cannon Design, an internationally ranked architectural, engineering and planning firm, is pleased to announce Richard Smith has joined the firm as a Principal. Smith joins the leadership team for Cannon Design’s Science + Technology (S&T) practice and will focus on developing strategies for immediate and long-term growth.
| Jun 13, 2013
Winfrey hired as Health and S&T studio head for SmithGroupJJR Dallas
SmithGroupJJR, one of the nation’s largest architecture, engineering and planning firms, has hired David Winfrey, AIA, LEED AP BD+C, as leader of its Health and Science & Technology Studio at its Dallas, Texas office.
| Jun 13, 2013
WorkingBuildings acquires Specialty Operations Solutions
The WorkingBuildings Companies, a leading provider of comprehensive Owner-based solutions for the built environment, announces the acquisition of Specialty Operations Solutions (SOS), a national provider of research and laboratory services.
| Jun 13, 2013
Health Product Declaration Collaborative names Knott as Executive Director
John L. Knott Jr. has been named as the Health Product Declaration Collaborative’s (www.hpdcollaborative.org) first Executive Director following a national search. The Health Product Declaration Collaborative (HPDC) is a customer-led standards-setting organization committed to the continuous improvement of the building industry’s environmental and health performance, through transparency and innovation in the building product supply chain.
| Jun 13, 2013
AIA partners with industry groups to launch $30,000 'Designing Recovery' design competition
The program will award a total of $30,000 to three winning designs, divided equally between three locations: Joplin, Mo., New Orleans, and New York.
| Jun 12, 2013
More than 90% of New York City schools have code violations
More than 90% of New York City schools have at least one outstanding building code violation. Loose wires, stuck doors and inadequate ventilation are just some of the problems.
